My thoughts... My words...

2011-07-05T09:16:00.002+05:30

ढूँढ़ते हैं जिसे ये नैन बाँवरे

वो निगाहों से दूर है पर दिल के पास...

पर खबर यह नहीं है अब तक

कि वो ख्वाब है, या हकीकत, या सिर्फ एक एहसास...

These are a few of my favorite things!

2009-09-18T07:18:00.000+05:30

Waking up in the morning

to a bird's song of joy.

Finding in an old trunk

my favorite childhood toy!

Spending hours in the park

going to and fro on the swings.

These are a few

of my favorite things!

Cool drops of rain

splashing my face.

Some moments of peace

at my favorite place.

Choco caramel drinks and

spicy crispy corn rings.

These are a few

of my favorite things!

My hair, for once,

setting in a proper style.

A friend's twinkling eyes

and mischievous smile.

A cute little anklet

and big silver earrings.

These are a few

of my favorite things!

Beautiful colors of

the sky at dawn.

A little baby's carefree

cute lazy yawn.

Fallen leaves of autumns,

scented breeze of springs.

These are a few

of my favorite things! :)

(Inspired by the song from The Sound of Music)

:-)

2009-06-26T16:08:00.009+05:30

Hi Little Darling,

Since your mommy daddy have not decided on a name for you yet, for now I'll call you my Faith. :)

I am your Aunty Peace, your papa's friend. I know you might never get to read this note, but I'm still writing it to you as I really don't know how soon we'll get to meet and talk...

Sweetheart, I'd been eagerly looking forward to your arrival and am so happy to know you're here safe, happy and healthy.

Today's your third day in this world with your family, and I hope you're loving every moment of it, and enjoying all the love that everyone around you has to shower on you. I have been dying to meet you, even more so after i saw your pictures... You look so charming and adorable, Faith baby, just can't wait to hold you... Some reason or the other is delaying my visit to you, but all my prayers, wishes, thoughts, and love are constantly with you.

I pray to God almighty to bless you with a long, happy, healthy, and fulfilled life. With abundance of love and laughter. May Jesus watch over you always and shower His choicest blessings on you, just as He sent you as a beautiful blessing for your loved ones.

Keep spreading love and joy amongst everyone around, just the way your papa does.

Welcome to the world and to our gang, little angel. I love you dearly...

With all my love,

Aunt Peace

Did you ever experience the real joys of life?

2009-06-05T21:35:00.006+05:30

Did you ever bite into a steaming hot pakoda just as your mom was taking it off the stove?

Lay in bed on a beautiful morning listening to the sound of birds and looking out the window at the rising sun?

Ever felt the joy of raindrops hitting your face?

Did you ever have times when you were sitting with friends laughing like crazy over nothing at all?

Ever had someone tell you despite all your flaws that you are beautiful?

Does your best friend instantly come up with PJs to cheer you up when you're feeling low?

Did you ever have a loved one hold you close with a silent reassurance that he loves you with all his heart?

Ever smiled listening to one of your all time favorite songs after a long long time?

Ever fought with your sibling over that last bite of maggi?

Did you ever pounce on a single bowl of maggi along with 10 of your friends fighting for your share as if it was the secret of survival?

Ever had a baby fall asleep in your arms?

Have you ever felt droplets of water trickling down and tickling your cheek and neck right after a hair wash?

Have you ever shed a tear of joy seeing your best friend (finally) get married to her sweetheart?

Have you ever had an year old baby put his arms around your neck and give you a hug?

Ever exchanged a smile and a wave with a shy toddler in the car next to yours at a traffic signal?

Ever played antakshari with friends while stuck in a terrible traffic jam? Or got off the car, played music on your phone and danced on the road while stuck due to a landslide? (if not, must try!)

Did you ever get an unexpected text message from your beloved saying he loves you?

Ever cheered and clapped for your best friend as he walked up the stage to collect a well deserved award?

Did you ever get caught making funny faces with a little kid?

Experienced the bliss of a piece of chocolate melting in your mouth? or a sip of hot frothy coffee on a lazy winter evening?

Ever licked icing off your fingers after having a slice of a super yummy cake?

Did you ever wake up in the morning with a kiss on your forehead?

Have you ever missed someone and found yourself smiling thinking about the times shared together?

Ever had a friend come to drop you all the way home from work because you were not feeling too well?

Have you ever thanked God for fulfilling a big or small wish?

If you smiled or nodded at any of these, you have experienced the true joys of life!

Tell me, did you?

Some conversations that left her speechless...

2009-06-05T00:46:00.009+05:30

They sound so funny today, but she is still speechless!

(i)

Him: main yahaan itna pareshan aur depressed hoon

Her:You keep repeating this all the time! You think I'm enjoying my life and partying everyday?!

3 weeks later

Him: Main itna pareshan aur depressed hoon

Her: Main bhi bilkul unaffected nahi hoon. Iss pareshani ki wajah sey i spent a night in ICU getting my ECG done and blood pressure monitored AT THE AGE OF 24!

Him (with a confused look): But aapne toh kaha tha you are enjoying life and partying everyday...

Her, head in hands, is speechless!

(ii)

Him: Main toh apney friends sey tips leta hoon ki fiancee key saath kya kya karna chahiye. Aap bhi apni friends sey poocha karo.

(these friends happen to be single themselves! anyways)

Her: Pata nahi. I'm not very sure if that works... I feel that every relationship is different and depends on the people involved. What works in one relationship might not work in another. So i don't think an outsider can know better as to how our relationship would work out...

Him: Hmmm... baat mein damm toh hai! You are very intelligent! par... bina tips liye how do you know what to do?!

and Her is speechless...

(iii)

Him: Dadiji is very serious. hospital mein hain. Actually, the doctor has given the answer.

(Didn't get it? Try literal translation of "Doctor ne jawaab de diya hai")

Her is thinking till today how to react at this one!

(iv)

Her: As I was saying pehley bhi... these problems could also be because of the long distance thing. And i'm hoping that everything will be fine when you get back.

Him (highly agitated): Yeh long distance sey kuch nahi hota. My friends say it's all nonsense.

Her: No doubt your friends mean good, par without knowing our relationship how can they know if it's sensible or nonsense?

His is annoyed and wants to disconnect the line. It's fine by Her

Later that day

His: You were right. these problems can be because of the long distance

Her: What makes you think so now?

Him: Aapko lag raha tha ki my friends being outsiders decide nahi kar saktey, issliye mainey google search kiya!

Her is hair-splittingly, teeth-grittingly speechless (i know hair-splittingly and teeth-grittingly are grammatically incorrect. But you understood what am trying to say, right?)

(v)

Her wrote an email to Him after Him had sent Her an ecard with a "personal message" copied direcly from someone else's message. It was quite evident because the message ended with an "I love you (Him)"

Her: "Hi,

Looks like you forgot to delete the last line from the card you just sent me. It reads: "I love you (Him)"

Him: I love you too Her

Her is speechless!

(vi)

A day after Him and Her were introduced for the first time, Him sent Her a text message that read "I love you sweetheart." and was a bit disappointed when Her didn't respond with the same. A quite surprised her smiled and responded

Her: :-) Don't you think it's too early to develop this feeling? We have spoken to each other for literally 10 minutes till now!

Him: Actually you are right. It is too early. Merey friends ney mujhey bola that i should say this to. that's why i was saying it.

Her is speechless .......... (and touched too as she thought it was so innocent!)

A Letter of Gratitude to My Best Friend

2009-05-29T20:05:00.014+05:30

Hi Buds,

After our chat conversation today, I just had to write this.

I had been feeling a bit restless and low since yesterday and wasn't able to figure out why. And while talking to you today, it all started pouring out by itself... The thoughts about my ex-fiance and failed engagement. After talking to you I am feeling better, but i can't help replaying those few months in my mind again. And when i do that, the one thing that i realize at every point is how you helped me deal with it all through that time, and after it was over...

Initially when i started discussing the small things with you that i felt were going wrong, you didn't blindly sympathize with me... But tried to show me a man's perspective and explain why it was happening the way it was. There were times when i felt you were being so unfair by being so fair. :-) You are my best friend and you should be supporting me, not him! But then i realized that you were supporting me only, by making sure i understand his perspective too and not get into any misconceptions or prejudices. You were, as always, being a true friend by not supporting me in what i was doing, but making sure that i did the right thing!

Remember how you suggested that i make a list of all the positives and negatives of that relationship and assign values to them based on how important they were to me? I did that for a month... by the end of which it was absolutely clear what the right decision would have been...

But then, who had the courage to take that drastic decision? Not me! But it was your gentle support, all the love and care, your prayers, the assurance that i was right, your scolding me and pulling me together when i was falling apart, listening to me for as long as i had thoughts to think aloud and things to say, your holding me when i cried and making me smile through my tears, understanding and feeling my pain, and constantly being by my side that gave me the courage to make up my mind and discuss my thoughts with mom and dad... And then on that day, when i prayed to God to make it easy for me, He made sure that i didn't have to worry about anything at all, and made it alright Himself...

As you know, i don't have the slightest regret of that relationship not working out, and am ever so thankful to God almighty that i saw the truth before it was too late... But what you don't know is that i would not have survived that nightmare without your support. I would not have been able to make this life saving decision if you hadn't helped me find the courage to do so. And, you know about the after effects of this episode... who knows it better than you! I came out of it without losing my sanity (whatever of it i had), just because you were there with me and never let me feel lonely or victimized...

And today, i can look back and laugh about most of those things because you taught me to move on...

I don't have words to thank you, and honestly i don't even want to thank you. But i want you to know that you have been one of the biggest and the most beautiful blessing to me, not just through those three months, but since the day we became friends some three years back... :)

May our bond keep getting stronger with every passing day... :-)

God bless you in a mighty way!

Lots of love,

Peace

*****************************************************************************

There were some more dear ones who made that journey much easier and bearable for me.

The one who called me up daily without fail, loved me, scolded me, guided me, supported me just like an elder sister would have (and has completely disappeared since this ended!);

The one who listened to me endlessly and tirelessly, constantly assured me that everything would turn out to be fine, but kept her opinion on the matter to herself till the very end! Something i really appreciate...;

The one who inspite of being hundereds of miles away in Bangalore was constantly by my side, always there, connected through emails, chat, phone calls or SMSes;

The one who initially was worried about the social implications of it all, but later on stopped giving a damn about society and was just concerned about me :-);

And the one who spent sleepless nights, not feeding her 6 months old daughter, but worrying about me...

Girls, I'm sure you'll understand where i'm talking about you. Thank you so much for helping me survive through that nightmare. I know this post is coming in quite late... Never had the strength to write anything about it, but somehow, found that strength today... :-)

Between Friends...

2009-04-29T09:28:00.003+05:30

Meeting after more than a couple of weeks...

Pari: You have lost a lot of weight!

Me: Naah... Nott att alll.

Pari: It certainly does look like it.

Me: Really?

Pari: Yes.

Me: If that's the case, that makes me verrryyy happy!

After a while...

Pari: Let's have ice-cream! Chocolate cornetto...

True friends really don't let us lose ANYTHING!! Do they? :D

My Wish...

2009-04-17T00:13:00.002+05:30

Today I experienced a sense of complete peace and serenity through the eyes of a 17 months old girl, Swechchha -- my wish...

I entered the room in Matri Chhaya that was reserved for the older children, or "bade bachche" as they called them. These older children turned out to be babies in the age group of 7-12 months. With the exception of Swechchha who, at 17 months, sat amongst them feeding herself a pomegranate with the incredible expertise of a grown up. She looked at me, I smiled, she smiled back and instantly I knew a bond was formed!

Matri Chhaya is an institute of the Sewa Bharti trust and provides a home to homeless infants -- lost, disowned and orphaned babies. People leave babies in a cradle outisde the home, ring the bell and disappear, and they are welcomed in the Matri Chhaya family, looked after and are adopted by childless couples.

I visited this place today and met the babies. There were three rooms with cradles lined against the walls. One room was assigned to the older babies, one to the middle aged babies (middle age here happens to be between 2 to 7 months), and the third room was for the new born ones. It was so heartbreaking to see so many homeless infants. And the saddest part was that even today, most of those abandoned children were girls -- unwanted female children!

After spending some time with the little ones I was sitting in the visitor's room talking to the institute's in charge when Swechchha toddled into the room and stood in front of me. She was brought to Matri Chhaya in December by the district police after they found her all alone on a roadside, apparently abandoned by family. She looked up at me with huge and the most beautiful eyes I've ever seen!

I smiled and extended a hand towards her. After hesitating for a moment she very delicately held it and stepped closer to me. With an overwhelming surge of love I took her in my arms and kissed her cheeks and forehead. She instantly slipped her arms around my neck and buried her face in my shoulder and started cooing softly... after a few moments she looked into my eyes, and fixing her gaze there, arms still around my neck, moved her face closer and rested her forehead against mine... and she smiled... An incredibly innocent and loving smile...

That was the most blissful feeling that I have ever experienced... That unconditional love, the contentment of being loved even if it was just momentary and the joy that I saw in those eyes at that moment was worth more than anything else in the world...

I had wanted to spend a few hours over every weekend with those babies... but some figures of authority in my part of the world prohibit me from doing that, for their own reasons... I don't know if I'll be able to go again, but I've left a part of me there with Swechchha, and every child who looked at me with those loving and longing eyes.

They will be in my heart and in my prayers always... And I'm ever so thankful to God almighty for all the love and loved ones that He has blessed me with.

Is it only about Mumbai?

2008-11-30T22:34:00.010+05:30

Wherever I look these days, I see everyone discussing the attacks on Mumbai. Every news channel on television, every news website, even the blogs of almost all Indians talk about the terrorist invasion in Mumbai. It is such a big shock indeed that we're just not able to take our minds off this! The sudden loss of innumerable innocent lives (I don’t believe the figures in the news as more often than not, they’re not true!) has left everyone across the country with a heavy and angry heart.

I feel tears stinging my eyes when I see the shocked and shattered loved ones of the victims of this attack… I am filled with rage when I think about who is responsible for all of this. I feel like killing all the politicians and the “leaders” of this country…

We are all so greatly disturbed and affected by this. We find ourselves glued to the news to find out what’s happening and waiting for the situation to get better, praying for the families of the dead, for the safety of the hostages and the commandos… And in the midst of this all, a thought is constantly bothering me…

The media is constantly keeping us updated with the situation and condition in Mumbai… but WHY? Yes, why are they doing so? Because Mumbai is the biggest business city? Because all the big bollywood stars and n number of celebrities and important people inhabit the city? Because such an attack on the city could affect the economy of our country? Because we love that city…

Why is nobody bothered or even aware of the fact that such attacks happen in the north-eastern states of India every few days, and have been happening since God knows how many years? The entire state of Manipur, Assam, parts of Meghalaya and Arunachal are constantly attacked by militants. People there can’t burn crackers because the sound of crackers drowns the sounds of blasts and firings.

Do we know that a mindless firing similar to Mumbai had happened in Assam last year killing around 100 people? Do we know a blast in Imphal on 21^st October killed over 20 people and injured many many more? The serial blasts in Assam that killed supposedly 84 people made it to the news one day and were forgotten on the next… And these things keep happening constantly! Militants have made themselves totally comfortable and at home in these states, and NOBODY CARES! No commandos or marcos go to save and protect these people… Are they not human beings living there? Do they not require as much protection as our Mumbaiwalas? Such incidents there don’t even make it to the news headlines.

Probably it’s because there’s nothing famous or fancy about these states. They are no business hubs for our country and are of no monetary benefits to the central government. But they are also innocent human beings… How can we be so sensitive and so affected by a tragedy in one city and totally ignore the same thing happening in another within our own country?

People, please wake up… and stop being so selective in being sensitive!

Me in some good times... along with my partners in all crimes! :-)

2008-11-29T01:18:00.005+05:30

Love you all!!!

Make video montages at www.OneTrueMedia.com

Apology to a dear friend...

2008-08-12T07:56:00.003+05:30

Dear Blog,

How are you doing? I am really sorry for neglecting you since so long! Life got really busy and crazy because of which i have not been able to devote as much time to my social circle as i used to. I know that's no excuse to be given to a friend as dear and close as you, one who's been with me through all ups and downs of life... but i know you will forgive me... (No! I'm not taking you for granted. I just know that you love me as much as i love you!)

Let me give you a brief update about how my life has been since i last interacted with you... You already know about us being blessed with Viraj. Life has changed completely since then, and the changes range from job change to a change in my relationship status! :-) I need to rush off to work now, but i'll be back this evening with all the details... See you then! :-)

Lots and lots of love to you,
Aman

They fill me with love...

2008-05-31T23:59:00.018+05:30

I never knew being a maasi would be such a wonderful feeling... Suddenly an unknown doctor walked out of the nursery carrying a baby in her arms, and the next thing i knew, that little bundle of a person had become the centre of my life. A small, almost invisible, smile on his face fills me with joy. The moment he cries, i feel like crying too. When he snuggles up close to me as he sleeps in my arms, i feel so blessed! Seeing him hungry makes me forget all the golgappas and chocolates in front of me, inspite of the fact that i haven't even had a bite since morning... It's a feeling that i cannot describe in words, so just leaving some pictures here of the two babies whom i simply adore...

God has been so kind, He gave me a niece (Archoo's baby) and a nephew (Deepti's baby) within a span of 4 weeks. Thank you God, I'm the happiest girl in the world... :-)

Who am I?

2008-05-10T21:32:00.005+05:30

For some I’m a mystery,
For some others I might be a misery,
I am a joy for some living being,
While someone says I’m a blessing.

At times I’m a confused living soul
At others, a struggler trying to achieve my goal.
Today I’m a woman who knows how to enjoy life
While yesterday I thought life is a lonely strife.

Good or bad, happy or sad,
Pretty or ugly, is upto you to see…
All I care about is that I am
Whatever my God wants me to be!

To Stop The Train, Pull Chain!

2008-01-11T16:29:00.004+05:30

This post has absolutely nothing to do with the title, any train or any chain. This phrase was the first thing to have popped up in my mind as i opened a document to write... so wrote it down! :-)

Just opened my blog and realized poor thing is being terribly neglected and needs some attention. It’s funny how I can’t stop writing when I’m upset, and the thought of writing just doesn’t occur to me when in high spirits. And surprisingly nothing at all manages to pull me down these days (tightly holding on to wood)! Have just learnt to find happiness within and around me. So now, life is just beautiful!!

A few days back I was having a discussion with my dearest friend about how we should empty ourselves completely and let God fill us up, and He will fill us with happiness… and without realizing, this is what I had been doing since the past few weeks or so. Leaving everything in the hands of God, and finding God’s hand in everything.

Apart from God, here are a few more people who add smiles to my days and my life…

My family of course… Got no life without them!!

Archana, the most wonderful friend anyone could ever have!! Lucky me, she’s my bestest friend!!

Ranit, my dearest friend, guide and the most beautiful blessing in my life…

Priya, :-) Another one very close to my heart!

Samira… My daily dose of love and laughter.

Rupi, my school friend and the psychologist who helps keep my mind on track!!

NIIT gang: Rashmi, Ranit (again!), Vani, Me (yes, me too), Asha (the kiddo), Anku, and Arjun (balding brotherly boss). This group can add cheer to the dullest of times!!

My cousins… The ones who are family as well as friends.

Ritu, Ching, and Ajanta… The cartoons at calibrated group who keep running laughter riots around me!!

There are so many more who have touched my world in many ways, big and small...

Thanks guys... For contributing in my life in your own special ways!!

Time to leave… :-) Happy weekend people!! Enjoy yourself. Keep smiling… God bless!!

एक हसीन रात...

2007-12-07T12:55:00.003+05:30

एक वो हसीन रात थी, जब बिन माँगे
फ़लक से सितारे उतर आ गिरे दामन में मेरे
बाँवरा हो कर झूम उठा था यह मन
और मेरे ख्वाब जुड़ गये थे सपनों से तेरे...

पहले कब थी इतनी खूबसूरत यह ज़िन्दगी
उस रात कदमों तले जैसे बिछे हुए थे बादल
खुशी में थिरकने लगे थे मेरे पाँव
और मेरे चाँद ने ओढ़ाया मुझे चाँदनी का आँचल

सपनों से सुन्दर हकीकत थी उस रात की
ज़िन्दगी लग रही थी जैसे फूलों का एक बिस्तर
पर उस सुकून के साथ एक डर बैठा था मन में
कि यह फूल मुरझा गये, तो रह जाएगी बस काँटों की चादर

बेबुनियाद तो नहीं था मेरा वो डर
यह तो मालूम था कि उस रात की सुबह तो आनी थी
किस्मत में लिखी नहीं थी वो रात हमारी
वो खुशियाँ और उनकी यादें तो हमपर खुदा की महरबानी थी

मेरा अरमान था वो जैसे चाँद को छूने का
चाहे पा ना सकी, पर शुक्र है उसे खोया भी तो नहीं है
उसे छूकर और करीब लाने की उम्मीद बाकी ना सही,
इनायत है खुदा की, कि नज़रों के सामने आज भी मेरा वो चाँद वहीं है!!

Untitled...

2007-11-22T17:22:00.000+05:30

Just as darkness was taking over
And stars hid behind clouds in the sky,
I heard your voice and turned around
To see the shining light in your eyes!

When you held my shoulders and looked at me,
The smile on your face wiped all my tears.
When your loving hug touched my heart,
T’was all that I could ask for, to soothe my fears.

The love that you showered on me,
Washed away all that loneliness and pain.
All those hurt and wounds and bruises were cured
In your caress my world looked happy again...

Little did I know, this life
Had some other stories in store.
The joys of your presence were short lived,
And... it's yesterday once more…

Rushing came back those days
Of pain and suffering, hurt and tears.
When least prepared I was,
I found myself standing face to face with my worst fears.

Now gone are the bright days full of smiles
And came back those dark nights so deep
When once again, tired, shattered, and lonely,
I cried myself off to sleep…

May All Their Wishes Come True...

2007-11-21T14:40:00.000+05:30

Someone has so beautifully mastered
The art of breaking my heart
Without so much as a word,
They know how to tear me apart.
To whom do I complain?
For I certainly blame them not
My expectations soared too high,
The fault was entirely on my part…

I gave them my care, my prayers, my love
And hoped for it in return too
My wishes were pure and honest
And the gods above would have helped me pull this through...
But what they asked for was something else
So, what else could the almighty do?
After all, it was also my dearest wish
That may all their wishes come true…

Yesterday Once More... can't get it out of my mind!!

2007-11-19T11:41:00.000+05:30

Have been humming this since morning. One of my ALLTIME favourite songs... Thanks to the Carpenters for such awesome compositions!! These guys are just great!!!

When I was young
I'd listen to the radio
Waitin' for my favorite songs
When they played I'd sing along
It made me smile.

Those were such happy times
And not so long ago
How I wondered where they'd gone
But they're back again
Just like a long lost friend
All the songs I loved so well.

Every Sha-la-la-la
Every Woah-oh-OH
Still shines
Every shing-a-ling-a-ling
That they're startin' to sing's
So fine.

When they get to the part
Where he's breakin' her heart
It can really make me cry
Just like before
It's yesterday once more.

Lookin' back on how it was
In years gone by
And the good times that I had
Makes today seem rather sad
So much has changed.

It was songs of love that
I would sing to then
And I'd memorize each word
Those old melodies
Still sound so good to me
As they melt the years away.

Every Sha-la-la-la
Every Woah-oh-OH
Still shines
Every shing-a-ling-a-ling
That they're startin' to sing's
So fine.

All my best memories
Come back clearly to me
Some can even make me cry.

Just like before
It's yesterday once more.

Another self assesment... What color is my brain??

2007-11-12T13:01:00.000+05:30

Your Brain is Purple

Of all the brain types, yours is the most idealistic.
You tend to think wild, amazing thoughts. Your dreams and fantasies are intense.
Your thoughts are creative, inventive, and without boundaries.

You tend to spend a lot of time thinking of fictional people and places - or a very different life for yourself.

What Color Is Your Brain?

What Do My Stars Say About Me?

2007-11-12T10:45:00.000+05:30

Just came across this link in someone's blog and tried it for myself... Let's see how accurate it is...

Abstract thoughts: verrrrriiieeee true!!

Intelligent and clever: Well, i'm not so sure of this... (Hello! this is modesty speaking... hehehe)

Changing personality: YES!

Attractive. Very sexy: That's a tough one... Modesty not letting me agree, and honesty not letting me disagree!! :-D

Temperamental: Very mcuh!

Trustworthy: Now, keeping modesty aside, Yes. I AM trustworthy...

Unpredictable. Loves freedom. Rebellious when restricted: Agree with this as well...

Too sensitive and easily hurt: Yeah, that is true.

Easily angered: Not really!

Romantic on the inside not outside: Can't we add a "very" before the "romantic??" (blinking and blushing) hehehe :-)

इन्तज़ार...

2007-11-09T23:54:00.000+05:30

Just came across another one that I had scribbled a long time back...

थक गए हैं हम इन्तज़ार करते करते...
निकलने लगा है दम आहें भरते भरते...
सूख गए हैं आँसू आँखों से बहते बहते...
और टूट गए हैं हम यह कहते कहते...

काश! कोई तो हमें भी समझ पाता...
कोई तो हमारे दिल का दर्द जान जाता...
अपनो को खोना इतना आसान नहीं होता...
ना करते तुम ऐसा, तो यह दिल भी नहीं रोता...

हमसे पूछो क्या होती है तनहाई...
हमने देखा है किसे कहते हैं दर्दे जुदाई...
बहुत हो चुका! अब तो सुन लो मेरी पुकार...
नहीं होगा हमसे अब और इन्तज़ार...

क्योंकि, थक गए हैं हम इन्तज़ार करते करते...
और निकलने लगा है दम आहें भरते भरते!!

Proud to be an Indian!! Am I??

2007-10-26T12:23:00.001+05:30

My grandmom had to undergo a small surgery, and is admitted in ‘Sri Balaji Action Medical Institute.’ I went to see her in the hospital on the very first day and was highly impressed by all the facilities and luxuries provided there.

After doing a number of tests in two days, they finally got her into the Operation Theatre for the surgery at 9 a.m. yesterday. The doctor walked up to my dad.

Doc: “Please deposit Rs. 30000 in the accounts department so that we can start with the surgery.”

Dad went to do so, but their accountant was not in the hospital yet!

Dad (sounding very worried): “Apparently the accountant hasn’t come yet. You please start off with the operation; I’ll deposit the money as soon as he’s here!”

Doc: “I’m sorry; we can’t start till the money is deposited.”

In the meantime, the ‘patient’ (pun intended) is lying in the OT, wondering and worrying about what’s wrong, and getting more demoralized with every passing moment. But does it matter to our docs? No! It does not!! Finally, the accountant arrives, the said amount is deposited, and a satisfied doctor begins the surgery…

Oh, and I forgot to mention, this hospital displays a huge board that reads ‘World Class Hospital!’
World class indeed!!

***********************

Later in the evening, while returning from the hospital, I had to pass the big lobby outside the emergency room and the scene there was something like this:

A middle aged lady (apparently not from a financially sound family) was shouting at the guard, and another very lean and thin woman lay unconscious in the arms of two people standing there, and there was an auto rickshaw waiting right at the entrance of the lobby. These people had been waiting in the so called “Emergency Room” of the hospital for over ONE-AND-HALF HOURS with not a single doctor to attend them, because they were not capable of bearing the expenses of that hospital. Hence they did not deserve to be treated in there!! After all, what is the value of someone’s life without any money in their pockets?! After seeing the treatment at this World Class hospital, threatening to file a complaint with the police, and stuffing that unconscious figure in the auto, they went off, in search of another hospital, in search of someone who was still a doctor and had not turned into a business man!

************************

I did not know how to react and dad took me away from there, we got into the car, and drove off. After sometime I asked dad:

Me: “What happens if a complaint is actually filed?”

Dad: “Hopefully the doctors will be arrested.”

Me: “Then why don’t we do it”

Dad: “We should!”

Me: “Then let’s go and do it! What are we waiting for?”

Dad: “That lady said that she will, and she looked bold enough to actually do it!”

Silence….

Just wondering, when there was no body to listen to her in a hospital, will her voice be heard in a police station? What sort of a ‘treatment’ would she get there? Did that poor woman get to see a doctor or died travelling from one hospital to another in search of a decent human being? What if we were not so blessed with everything? and it had been my grandmother, or me, instead of that unconscious woman? Would we still have let the hospital authorities go without trying to take any legal action?

All of us are witnessing such things in our country every single day, and ignoring it completely each time, just because we don’t want to get involved in all this and waste our time… Do we even have a right to say that “I’m proud to be an Indian?”

What is Love?

2007-08-03T13:55:00.000+05:30

Love is beauty, love is joy...

Love is understanding without asking why...

Love is the pleasure recieved from giving...

Love is the reason life gave us for living...

2007-08-02T20:35:00.000+05:30

There was this conversation happening between me and A, where I said something that reflected the strongly feminist side of me and A goes “Oh my gawwwddd!! Don’t tell me you also belong to the category of those lesbians who call themselves feminists!!”

So just a clarification my dear, that being a “feminist” is NOT the same as being a “lesbian!”
Feminists can, and do have their priorities straight! (Well, most of them…) They also fall in love with men, get married, have kids… That has nothing to do with being a feminist!!
To this she had to say “This is all diplomacy!! How can that be when these so called feminists (puts some unnecessary emphasis on the word) are so much against men?”

Now, we are not against “MEN,” but against “male chauvinism.” If you know what I mean… We are in “favor of women” does not indicate our sexual preference, but that we are in favor of women’s rights to equality, in favor of the fact that women are no way less than men…

It’s so funny to know the way some people think… *smiles to herself and stops writing…*

2007-07-30T23:07:00.000+05:30

Have been inactive for a while now.

Somehow, unable to revive the ability or the urge to write...

Yippee!!! Weekend's here... :-)

2007-07-07T22:46:00.000+05:30

Phew!! Finally I did manage to find my way to a word document with no work, but just my heart and mind and fingers… :-) Since so long, all the writing that I’d been doing is official documents, some analysis or reports, or some review comments…

But not tonight!! I deserve a break now! At times I’ve been wondering that we work to earn in order to have a comfortable life, but the amount being credited to our accounts every month is inversely proportional to the time we get to enjoy those comforts of a life surrounded by friends and family...

Since the past three weeks I have been having dreams/nightmares about work! Am I beginning to lose it???!! I hope not!! Struggling to achieve that work-life balance… Need to…

Enough of cribbing naa?? Let me be fair… Life hasn’t been that bad after all!! Even in the midst of unending w*** (don’t wanna use the “w” word again over the weekend!), I did manage to have my share of fun with some of my truly wonderful friends… If not in person, through chat and e-mail, and not to forget the short lunch meeting that turned an excruciatingly hot and dull Saturday afternoon into a bright and cheerful day full of smiles and laughter!!

When I logged in to my computer, I had ‘n’ number of things in mind that I wanted to write about. But they seem to have made a collective decision to slip out of my mind all at once!! See, my thoughts are so considerate towards all of you! They didn’t want me to torture you with a longer post!! Never mind… Some other time, if not now!! As of now, am just happy to finally have three quarters of a weekend (was at w*** for half day today) off to myself, which I plan to spend sleeping and reading… :-)

Happy weekend people!! And have a great week ahead!! Take care… God bless!!

Celebration Time!! Happy Birthday, SYNERGY!!! :-)

2007-06-20T12:52:00.000+05:30

It was exactly 2 years back!!! June 20, 2005

12 complete strangers became a second family to each other… Thinking back to that day makes me feel so lucky to have you all as my friends…

Priya, Sam, Pallavi, Shruti, Nidhi, Paro, Pooja, Josie, Smirti, Manika, and Rohan (the only one to have disappeared…), You’ve all been so wonderful all through this time, and mean a lot to me!!

It’s so weird, everything in life has changed so drastically during these last two years, and in every time of need, we so spontaneously turned towards one another!! Although we’ve all moved on in different directions now, but not even once did we fail to stand by each other…

Hope we stay like this for many more years to come!!

Once again, Happy Nappy Day, Synergy!!
Have a great day!!!

God bless us all!! :-)

PS. Won’t say love you all, for two reasons… First being, you all know already, and secondly, Sam will be in splits again the moment I say this!! *big hug* to all of you!!

PPS. There’s a new member added to Synergy!!!

Meet Siddhant-Nidhi’s son!! :-)

Just to tell you...

2007-06-15T10:20:00.000+05:30

R .... missed you a lot yesterday!!

And P... I'm jealous!!! :p (hehehe... shall i add "just kidding" here??)

Introspection???

2007-06-14T12:02:00.000+05:30

She sat there staring out of the window
As those familiar landscapes were left behind.
The songs and dreams and memories from those days
Came rushing back to her restless mind.

Surrounded by her companions,
She sang and jumped and danced about in the rain,
Was always delighted for no particular reason,
That little girl knew no sorrow, hurt, or pain.

Once again she could hear the much loved music in the air,
And in her ears the wind was playing the prelude,
All of a sudden she was snapped out of memories, into reality
And was hit by her loneliness and solitude.

The smile from the mouth faded and was replaced
By something in her eyes that looked very sad,
She searched through her memories to figure out
What was she missing most, out of all that she'd once had....

She'd loved and lost, so many friends came and left,
Each leaving their own marks on her heart's shelf
She missed each one, yes! But that was not all till she realized...
That more than anything else, she missed being her old self...

Height of Vellapanti...

2007-06-07T13:09:00.000+05:30

I've got nothing to write today... but i still feel like scribbling something...
So will pen down whatever thoughts are popping up in my head...

******
It's quite a dull day today... Didn't have much work, for a change, and i'm through with it already... But still, gotto sit here till 5:00 atleast. And the scorching sun outside is not even encouraging me to leave early...

******
It's getting so hot these days... It's been a while since i went out of delhi in summers... almost 3 years!! Last was the trip to Banglore, Mysore, and Ooty in 2004. Work, combined with so many things happening around prevented me from taking a vacation... Must do it soon now!!! Somewhere in the hills, or by the seaside...

******
Forget about vacation, I haven't even been to a movie since so long!! Must catch atleast a couple of them over the weekend...

******
Met Rupi last weekend. Lots of masti combined with some thoughtful discussions!! New innovative ideas, finding a direction to follow through to our desire to do something meaningful in life... Discussed it with Priya later in the evening. And the desire turned into a strong ambition... Lots of thinking and introspection and discussion helped us figure out what we wanna do... Also have an idea on how... It'll take a long time... But i'm sure we'll achieve it...

******
I should start working towards the implementation of the goal that i've set for myself... Got a long long way to go... The sooner we start, the better. Can't afford to let the excitement and the energy to fizzle out!!

******
Had a long chat with Ranit last night... It's always so refreshing talking to him! Fills me with life and energy... My daily dose of vitamin C and H... hehehe (He knows what i'm talking about...)

******
Spoke to Archoo a while back... We're hopefully meeting on saturday!! YIPPEE!!! Haven't seen her since over three months now!!! In fact after her marriage, we just met on my birthday, and Parul's wedding...

******
Shweta's and Anu's weddings are approaching... What am i going to wear for both the occasions??? Saree?? Whatever... It should just look good!!!

******
Ohh Man!!! I need to lose weight!!! :-(

******
Stopped thinking here and started reading all that i had been scribbling... It's wierd how one thought is leading me to another... If i see the first and the last, there's absolutely no connection in the two... and it all ran through my head in a matter of 5 minutes...

ok the chain is broken now... And it's time for lunch!! So i better hit the PUBLISH tab and get going... :-)
See ya...

Emancipated...

2007-06-07T10:57:00.000+05:30

The turbulent turmoil was contented,
When I managed to find answers to my questions…
Thanks to all the help and ideas from “R”!!
Another excitement is now presented,
As “P” gives me further refined and new directions…
And decides to join in, in our attempt to go high and far!!

******

Too much work, lack of time, and a strong desire to write made me crunch the thought into these few lines.
A detailed post will hopefully follow soon!!!

Till then…
Cheers!! :-)

Blessing in disguise…

2007-05-16T22:16:00.000+05:30

It’s human tendency to think time and again about all that we have lost in the past… I do that too more often than not… And these thoughts have been very dominant in my head since the last few days. But today, I want to enumerate all that I’ve gained from these losses, and thank the big guy above for it…

The last two years have been very difficult, with lots of things happening in my life. But these tuff times gave me the ability to endure anything and everything that life brings my way! The worst of times strengthened my hope, thinking since nothing can be worse than this; life has to take a better turn. Yes, there have been times when my optimism completely vanished, but thankfully, not for long!

What I thought to be the greatest loss brought along some wonderful friends, for whom I can never thank god enough! :-)! There have been a few people who came in when my life seemed to be crumbling. These people who were no more than mere acquaintances, stood by me, and showed the faith in me when I had stopped trusting myself! They became my strength when I felt shattered and helped me pull myself together… They became my inspiration to hold up and move ahead when I had given up…

I Can never forget Vandana’s encouraging me all the time to keep my chin up; Sam’s constantly reminding me of my inner strength that I had forgotten about; Priya’s immense love and faith in me that gave me the courage to keep going; Archoo’s unshakable optimism that I have something much better in store; Ranit’s firm belief that the almighty does everything for a reason; Pari's patient ears listening to all my wierd thoughts; and Rupi's clearing my head whenever it was clouded by unwanted thoughts and memories… and so many more friends who proved to me in their own special ways that happiness exists and is near… Today, these people are not just friends, but a very important part of my life! They are the wonderful blessings that make my life worth living, and every moment of it worth treasuring…

Guys, I want to thank all of you for being what you are to me, and for always being around! Love you all from all my heart!

Oh and these days, I often see my feelings expressed in the words of a stranger… someone who’s been through a lot in life. I don’t know her, have never seen her, but her words bind her to me in some strange way. Unknowingly, unintentionally, she has given me great inspiration and has shown me an altogether different perspective towards life! Thanks T! Hope all the happiness and joys of life come your way soon!

God bless you all and me too!! :-)

A Question....

2007-05-13T17:19:00.000+05:30

Remains of a broken cloud
Scattered in the sky…
Or is it a dream
Shattered in my eye…??!

Some Random Thoughts...

2007-05-13T17:14:00.000+05:30

दिल ने जिसे अवाज़ दी,
इस रूह ने जिसे पुकारा,
बस उसी की याद में,
उसके एक एहसास की फरियाद में,
हमने ज़िन्दगी का हर लम्हा गुज़ारा!

********************

I almost let out a shriek
In an attempt to stop him
and hold him near…
But he escaped from my eye,
and rolled down my cheek…
That stubborn little drop of tear!

Enough!!!

2007-05-11T16:15:00.000+05:30

Ok!! Time to snap out of the blues now... Enough of brooding!!

Watch out!! I'll be back soon!! :-)

Drowned!!!

2007-05-10T19:47:00.000+05:30

I’ve lost my ultimate saving grace - The ability to express myself! The ability to write!!!

Here my feelings go down with the waves and drown today, with no words to save them and bring them ashore... And with these feelings, I drown in the ocean of pain...

Remembrance...

2007-05-02T19:35:00.000+05:30

I heard someone once say…

“ज़िन्दगी की राहों में ठोकर लगना
दुनिया का दस्तूर होता है।
जिस से दिल प्यार करता है
वो ही आँखों से दूर होता है।”

This couplet inspired me write something…

This world was so beautiful
Until you were here…
There was a smile in my heart
It left no place for any fear!

You were the most precious gift to me
Of which I would not let go, even for my life’s sake.
Now it appears to be like a long lost dream,
All so untrue and fake.

All that you could leave with me,
Were those memories to be cherished…
But what about the moments we spent together –
Where have they all perished??!

Today, when I close my eyes
And turn towards the heaven above…
All my lonely heart can say is –
Come back to me, My Love!

Taking A Walk Down The Memory Lane...

2007-04-26T17:39:00.000+05:30

First time in the history of Holy Child School was an alumni organized, and i was amongst the lucky few who managed to be a part of it!! :-)

Entered those gates after 6 years! The passage, the corridors, the statue of Mother Mary, the lobby, the grounds, the stage... it was all the same.... A look at that familiar territory brought along a sudden wave of nostalgia. It was like coming back home after a long exile!! :-)

The best part was getting to see the teachers, and all my long lost (and new found) friends! The feeling is beyond expression... Something i just cannot express in words!! Here are a few pictures...

L-R: Puneet, Rupi, Me, Vidhu, and Kanu...

Mrs Bimla Singh with Rupi, two of the bestest people of HCS!! :-)

Mrs Kiran Kumar, and our very own, Miss Vidhu Sethi :-)

With our Principal, Sr Therese

Some of us from our batch of 2001!!!

Hope to see more of such alumnis...

Hail to our Holy Child School!!! :-)

Was I Right In My Perception???

2007-04-18T23:23:00.000+05:30

Recently we’d gone to Abohar for my cousin Tina’s wedding…

Tina is settled in Australia since the last 15 years, and the guy, Sumer, is from Abohar, a small town in Punjab… Now how this relation was arranged is a different story in itself, as of now I have just one thought in mind for this post.

At the sagan ceremony, somebody from Sumer’s family had organized for an “Orchestra” along with the DJ to show something new and entertaining to the bride’s family! Supposedly it was a way of showing the Punjabi culture to all us Delhiites/Australians/Americans. When the function began, the “Orchestra” as it showed up turned out to be an announcer accompanied by a group of scantily dressed girls performing solo or group dances on some Hindi item numbers and some corny Punjabi songs!!

“New” it certainly was for all of us, but I’d like to replace “entertaining” with “embarrassing!”

While watching that function’s DVD today, I noticed something… Everyone in our family had a shocked and confused kind of an expression when the performances began! There were quite a few men gathered around the stage, seeing the show. While the women obviously wore a highly disapproving look. But there was something more interesting than that to watch!

There were a few kids (from ours as well as the groom’s family) gathered on the dance floor right in front of the stage. The little girls were busy showing their own dancing talents off, without giving a damn to the dancer behind them. And the guys, all of them between 5-9 years of age, stood there gazing fixedly at the dancers, with their eyes and mouths wide open!!!

Seeing this is making me think… Was my perception about men right? Are all men (now I can include little boys too!) the same??? Do they all drool over women like that?? What is it in the Y chromosome that makes them that way even at such an early age???

Follow The Leader!!

2007-04-11T09:04:00.000+05:30

I kept holding on to the past, following it constantly… scared of losing it… and life moved on, leaving me behind, while I wasn’t watching… and I lost a part of my life, my present!!

Understanding the loss, I finally decided to let go of the past… and then, life came to a standstill!!!
Today I smile as I realize that it appears to be still because I’m moving on in life, with it, at the same pace…

Now I hope and strive for the day when I will take the lead again… And my life will follow my way!!! :-)

...And I Entered the Bloggers' World!

2007-04-04T00:58:00.000+05:30

"Me, blogging?!! No Way!!"

This is what i said till last night! Although i've always been very fond of writing, and i do write a lot, i never felt my words were good enough to be shared with the world... More than the words, i was apprehensive about sharing my feelings.

And i still am!!!

But last night, after reading a few lines written by me, a very dear friend threatened me that she would not update her blog till she had mine up! Now i can't let all those suffer who love to read her blog (that includes me!). So, here i am...

And those lines were -

"So many touched my life,
but my heart was touched by a chosen few...
Only you could mark my soul,
As a rose is embellished with a drop of dew...

You came in my life as the dream,
Which i thought could never come true...
Now be my friend forever,
And give me the honor to always love you!!!"

Hope you enjoy reading my thoughts and my words!!! :-)
Cheers!

P.S. Want to Thank (or blame :p) Priyanka for providing me with the driving force (or the threat :D) to create this blog!

Thanks a ton Pari!! :-)